First off, hats off to Messi for this even being a story. Sick brag bro, you have this super hot Brazilian chick posting these in your honor because she and her award winning ass wants to have sex with you. Gotta let everyone know that you had to block a girl from continuing to try and get you to bang her because your super hot wife made you. You just couldn't smash Miss BumBum, a woman who won an award for having a great ass in a country known for great asses. You may be the best soccer player ever, but Ronaldo 100% would sex this bitch right? He's married to someone super hot but he seems like the kind of guy who would sleep around, ESPECIALLY with Miss BumBum here. So sick brag on two fronts here with Messi, one he could totally bang Miss BumBum, and two he's such a good guy that he'll let his wife block her and just won't. We get it Messi, you're a great guy. I don't know about you all but I don't have Miss BumBum knocking down my door but hey Miss Bum, if you're reading this (she's not) hit me the fuck up. I'm not rich, not jacked, moderately attractive (in my humble opinion), and kinda funny (you guys can be the judge of that one), literally nothing sets me apart from the pack, but hey what's life without a little risk guaranteed disappointment.
Oh, and just in case you didn't read the article, how about Miss BumBum just passive-aggressively torching Messi's wife:
“I was completely shocked when I spotted it. If I could, I would tell her not to be worried about me – I’m just a fan. I’m surprised that she isn’t more sure of herself,” she said. “I guess it can only be because she is jealous. It’s very silly because I’m just a football fan and a huge fan of Barcelona. This is such an overreaction”
Cortez added, “I only follow about 10 people, and he was one of them. So when I saw that I was blocked I thought it could only be jealousy. Why would he block me if he has 40 million followers? Then I checked her profile and confirmed she had also blocked me.”
Shots fired at Miss Messi. So insecure she had to have BumBum Cortez blocked! Honestly what chick wouldn't do that move though? Name one, you can't. Guys too, if I'm dating someone and some guy is blasting sick ab pics and tagging her in it, or sending her dick pics or whatever the guy equivalent to this situation is, I'm trying to cut off her contact with that asshole. And so are you, I don't care how chill you are. Anyway, one final note, here's Messi's wife:
Poor Messi, can't have sex with Miss BumBum, he just has to keep having sex with his hot wife.
Like this post? Share it! If you don't share it I'll get Miss BumBum to call you out for being too insecure to share it.
No comments:
Post a Comment